bones: it is still over the horizon …

please have babies. kthxbye. // fox promotional photo

… but there is lightning in the air.

Obviously, season five of Bones is really ramping up the romance for Booth and Brennan.

Since Cyndi Lauper told Booth it was all going to work out eventually, it’s been basically nonstop squee and fluff.  Booth has confessed he’d die for Brennan, she’s confessed there’s nothing she wouldn’t do to help Booth, he asked her to be his village and help bring up Parker, they almost kissed (in fancy dress!), she gave him a key to her apartment, and they told each other they love one another–of course only in a professional manner.  Oh, and Cam, Sweets, and Gordon Gordon have now all used the words “Booth,” “in love with,” and “Dr. Brennan” in the same sentence.  (Apparently, Sweets’s book concludes with the revelation that the partners are in love with each other.)  All this, and it’s only episode seven.

Anyway, Booth loves Brennan, and he knows it big time.  Brennan almost definitely loves Booth, but she probably doesn’t know it yet, and Booth’s pretty sure she likes him just as a friend.

Yet the fandom remains on the edge of their seats, totally expecting them to hook up at any possible moment.  And while I’ll admit I was momentarily overcome with HOLY CRAP THEY’RE GOING TO KISS in “A Night at the Bones Museum,” I think the best thing we as fans can do is just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Because I guarantee you they’re not getting together for a long, long time.  (And by that, I mean probably this season finale.)  Here’s why.

First of all, listen to what the show’s telling you.  The words out of Cyndi Lauper’s mouth were as follows: “You two are going to keep doing things as usual … My cards tell me this all works out eventually.”

Literally, you’re sticking with the status quo for now–but later on, you can have all the sex.

Last week, Gordon Gordon counseled “hope and patience,” yet I was shocked at how many viewers erupted with OMG IT’S COMING IT’S COMING IT’S COMING.

It’s really not.  Yes, they’re stepping it up.  Yes, this is good.  But I think we had better gear up for the rest of season five to just continue like this–highly romantic and full of anticipation–but not quite following through.

(In a sentence: don’t get your hopes up for Christmas.)

From the meta perspective, look at ratings.  The thing is, Bones is having a strong season.  Bones is gaining viewers; it just moved into second place for its timeslot.  There’s no practical reason for hooking up Booth and Brennan right now.  Which isn’t to say that the show should wait until the ratings decline–I don’t mean that at all.  But when the status quo is working so well, there’s no incentive to write consummation.  There just isn’t.

It’s not all bad news, though.  Regardless of whether or not Booth and Bones are actually together, the show remains one of the (if not the) most romantic shows on television.  Even in its heyday of romanticism, Grey’s Anatomy didn’t spend whole episodes discussing how deeply in love and denial Derek and Meredith were.  (A whole episode!  Sweets, Gordon Gordon, and Angela!  All talking about how much Booth and Brennan want to make babies with each other!)

Listen to Gordon Gordon.  Listen to Cyndi Lauper.  It’s going to happen eventually, and until then–hope and patience.  Hope and patience and the sweetest last-five-minutes-es on the airwaves.